Peter Berg Sank My Battleship

Published by Jeff Leins on: May 18th, 2009

Peter Berg is in talks to direct a board game-to-movie adaptation of the Hasbro property Battleship for Universal.

According to the Hollywood Reporter, brothers Jon and Erich Hoeber (Whiteout) are writing the script about an “epic naval action adventure.”  The rest of the details, in case anyone cares, are being kept secret.

The Hancock helmer joins the ranks of other filmmakers lured by Hasbro’s generous community chest.  Ridley Scott is attached to a big screen version of Monopoly, Kevin Lima has signed to bring Candyland to theaters, Gore Verbinksi has agreed to remake Clue, Michael Bay is producing a resurrection of the Ouija Board, and a script is being written for a Stretch Armstrong movie.  The numerous titles is part of an original six year deal between the game maker and the film studio.

“B7.” “You hit the bottom of the barrel!” The trend of brand name recognition continues to ruin movie production schedules, trading in originality and integrity for nostalgia and easy money. Toys and TV shows you might remember from your childhood are suddenly the greatest ideas ever for a mediocre movie. But they wouldn’t be getting made if people weren’t interested. Look at the fandom for movie adaptations of Transformers and G.I. Joe as examples of milking a familiar franchise for big, dumb blockbusters.

To be fair, Battleship may be the only game worth a shot among the onslaught of bad ideas. A fleet of destroyers firing cannons on the open sea can’t be all bad, especially if the writers are fans of The Hunt for Red October. Who am I kidding? This is going to be awful.