Jeff the Immortal

Published by Jeff Leins on: September 6th, 2007

Yesterday Variety announced that Universal had bought the rights to a movie called Jeff the Immortal, written by Chris Bishop. He says the story is about “a slacker who discovers he has supernatural powers but uses these new-found powers for selfish reasons.”

Listen, I know what you’re thinking. That I’m going to condone this movie. That I’m going to laugh about it and think, “This is hilarious, they’re making a movie with my name in the title!” You would assume that I’d make jokes about wanting to be involved. “Cast me in the lead role, I’m perfect for it,” I’d say in your twisted assumptive fantasy.

Well I’m not laughing. I don’t find this cute, or amusing. In fact, I find this to be outrageous. I have instructed my legal representation to (and I quote) “sue the pants off of those corporate fat cats.” I want their pants off… That’s how mad I am.

When Universal and this Chris Bishop character adapt a story about my life without my permission, then actions have to be taken. I was not consulted about this un-authorized, un-welcome, and frankly un-American.

The article says he got the idea while watching Highlander and wondering what his buddies would do with such powers.

Well, Bishop, I’ve seen Highlander too. In fact, I’ve seen all four. And they never sparked my creative nature to write about “Chris the Jerk.” Maybe I will. Maybe we’ll see how you like being called a slacker, tough guy. I work! Sometimes… Ok, very little.

Take a good look because this is the last you’ll hear about this project. I’m having this baby shut down tomorrow. And that will teach them to mess with Jeff the Immortal.